Tuesday, May 21, 2013

After cancer.

I shared with you that my dad had cancer last year, and beat it.  That was the good news.  The bad news is that it left him with Pulmonary Fibrosis, which is untreatable, and it is terminal.  Average life expectancy from diagnosis is 3 years, and his case is progressing very rapidly.  He's on oxygen 24/7, using a combo of tanks and a concentrator, and recently he's been using a wheelchair almost all of the time he's not in bed or on the couch.  He's lost a lot of weight (he's about 6ft and now weighs around 135 lbs).  He's still my dad, but he's a completely different person than he was a year ago.

If I'm being 100% honest, I don't expect him to make it even three years.  I will count myself extremely blessed if he even sees Christmas.  I don't think he believes he'll make it that long either.  We discussed recording his life story (he'll talk, I'll type, as he can't really write or type anymore) and he's said he wants to hit the highlights first and then go back and fill in as we have time.

The good news is, my parents are moving to our area.  They haven't sold their home yet, but God has worked his awesomeness and some friends of ours are working for a Christian camp this summer and were looking for someone to rent their house.  The timing of it was such that we looked at the situation and it was OBVIOUS that God had worked this out, and the house is set up to accommodate my dad's needs (right down to hardwood floors so his wheelchair will roll easily).  This will give us the opportunity to spend time with my dad and also help my mom out with his care.  There's a lot of stuff going on with my grandparents right now and my mom has had to deal with a lot of that as well, so this will mean my mom can take care of things there and my dad can stay with us as needed.  He's actually been with us all this week and it's been great having time with him and also seeing him enjoy time with Emersyn.

Having him here this week though, its clear what his health is now like, and it impossible to set aside the fact that he is rapidly declining.  While its nowhere near what my dad and mom are dealing with, I've been an emotional mess, and I don't really see that changing.  I just want him to get better, and I know without an absolute miracle, its not going to happen.  He's dying.

The other good news is, my dad is a believer in Jesus Christ, so we know when his time here is through, he'll have no more pain in heaven, and we'll see him again.  This is a great comfort, but really doesn't take the sting away from the idea of losing him.

I know a lot of you prayed for my dad when we found out he had cancer, and I ask that you continue those prayers.  


  1. Thinking of you guys! That's wonderful that they will be so close by to cherish every day.

  2. I'm so sorry to read this, Lori. I had no idea. Prayed and will keep praying.

  3. Oh Lori, I'm so sorry to hear that. I will be praying for your dad, you, and your entire family! I know that knowing he will be with Jesus is some relief but you are right in that it won't keep you all from missing him. Hugs to you!

  4. Wow...Lori. I'm so sorry. Cancer sucks, even when you beat it :( It is a blessing that he will be close to you guys and can spend these precious days/months with Emersyn. Also a blessing for your mom to have a little help. I will keep you all in my prayers. I think that is SO cool that you are gonna help him record his life story!!

  5. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I lost my dad 10 years ago to cancer and remember that agony. However,the time you have is such a gift that you will treasure forever and what a blessing that he gets to spend so much time with Emersyn. Thinking of you.

  6. Lori,
    We lost my beloved cousin who was 19 at the time to brain cancer. She survived 3yrs when we were told 6m-1yr. I think there is something so miserably hard about a long goodbye, but it's also so bittersweet. I know what its like to try to live each day with that person as full as you can make it and then having those glimpses of what is really happening. I am so thankful he will be near you and E. You will be in our prayers every night.

  7. Oh, mama. I am SO incredibly sorry to read this. Big fat hugs to you and your sweet family. Do your best and take it a day at a time.

  8. I can't imagine what you're going through...you are in my thoughts and prayers.