Friday, May 27, 2011

Please, someone tell me I'm normal.

OK, I'm not sure if it's because the time to try is getting closer, or what, but the last few days, I'm having some prickling little "are you sure you're ready for this" thoughts.  Having a kid is such a major life change, and while I would say the majority of the time I've always wanted kids, there were some times that I questioned if I would ever feel ready, or ever be ready to stop being... selfish.

There, I said it, I'm a little bit selfish (sometimes a lot selfish).  I want what I want, when I want it.  Now this doesn't mean I always act selfishly, there's a good deal of give and take in my life between spouse, family, work, etc.  But, for the most part, my life balance tends to balance out quite well in my favor. 

I don't get to sleep in everyday, or every weekend, but ocasionally, I'm snoozing until 10am.  I don't get to eat out every single night at fancy places, but if I don't feel like cooking, I can usually talk Husband into a night out.  My job may not be perfect, but it provides for us, and I'm able to pursue photography on the side.  We may not jet off every other weekend, but we've managed to travel a bit even while Husband has been in school.  We have a great life, and it will (hopefully) only get better once Husband graduates from school. 

Part of me says that having a baby will be a lot of work, and sacrifice, but in the end, it will be worth it all.  But the other part of me- the part that doesn't want to stop being selfish, is scared.  Is this normal?  Did any of you have these doubts before embarking on motherhood? 


  1. N. O. R. M. A. L. You're right on track, in my opinion. Even after getting PG, I still struggled with letting go of the 'old' life I'd lived. It's okay to sort of mourn that 'loss', if that makes sense. It's a huge change, so it would be weird to NOT have worries, in my opinion. Shows you're thoughtful and aware of yourself, and that you aren't jumping in without thinking.

  2. Completely normal. Except for I didn't think about it before I had kids. Just afterward, when it was too late to return them. lol.

    Tons of work & sacrifice. But it is totally worth it. (x3 so far for me!)

  3. I. get. you. if you wait til you ready, you will NEVER have kids. NO ONE is ready for kids. ever. they change your life. BUT. they change your life for the better. kids are awesome. but I am also like you. selfish. I like my adult time. My Las Vegas time. my time to party and be with my friends.

    do I get to do that as often as before kids? of course not. but is it worth it? OF COURSE. when your kids kiss and hug you, you will forget about your "selfish" needs.

    my only advice? just don't have like 5 kids. I have two and I AM DONE!

  4. Yes, I agree--totally normal. Big life changes tend to warrant a little worry! But, take a deep breath. It is the best life change you'll ever experience.